I’ve never felt so alive in my life. If I’m telling the truth, it stinks sometimes to be sitting around a table where you have no idea what the heck anyone is saying, because indigenous languages take precedence over Spanish at the dinner table. But then, it’s ok because you start to understand things and it starts to click, and you see the beautiful people and culture that’s right in front of your face and it’s all better.
I’ve never been in a situation before where I’m the one being laughed at because I don’t understand what’s going on (haha, I’m usually the one doing the laughing…)
I’ve never been in a situation where I feel absolutely useless (trying to understand how to help out at the market? HA! When pigs fly will I understand how they bargain, find that exact bag or headband that they want, close up the shop, etc.
I’ve never been in a situation where I feel so alive and full of love. Full of love for the incredible people around me and the beautiful culture that I have the privilege of experiencing.
And finally, I have never been in a situation where I can just tell that everyone around me loves me so well. Everyone. Whether it’s completely going out of their way for me when I’m sick or giving up their time for me, every single person just cares so deeply for me.
The Lord is teaching and will continue to teach me so much through this experience. First and foremost, He has taught me how to rely solely on Him for everything. First. And by first, I mean that before I go to my friends or other confidantes about anything, I am bringing everything to Him. And I think that that is probably one of the most valuable lessons I have ever learned in my entire life.
Other than having Him teach me things spiritually, He is teaching me so many things about His world He created. For instance, I am just growing so much in my knowledge of Spanish and the culture here in Guatemala. I want to show you part of my journal entry the night before I left for Guatemala. Here it is…
June 4th, 2014 11pm
“Be brave. The overarching theme of the Bethel concert last week. Exactly one week ago. Now, when I wake up, I will be flying to Guatemala. Alone. For a month. Not only have I never flown alone before but I have also never been away from my parents for more than a week. This is literally SO nerve-wracking. But at the same time, I am just so completely open to see the opportunities that the Lord has in store for me over the course of this next month. I’m ready to grow, because honestly, I have NO ONE else in the entire world to bring all of my conversations to. When I trip up in my Spanish and have actually no idea what I am saying, or how to get from Point A to Point B, I know that I have an unfailing God who has an unfailing love. Am I scared so much that I don’t even know how to put this into words? Maybe. But is it going to all be ok? Absofrickenlutely. Because I know I’m going into this with a 100% open heart, ready to be taught. Taught in my Spanish skills. Taught culturally. And most importantly, taught by my Father how to trust in Him completely. That’s all. I’m going to bed now because I fly out SUPER early.”
Sometimes, I’ll just look back on this in awe, because what I’ve learned so far is exactly what I was ready for the Lord to teach me. I am so in awe of how every detail, every part of this trip has come together so beautifully, and how clearly the Lord has had His hand on me every step of the way! I just wanted to give you an update on my life, and I’m sure I’ll be back soon with more!